come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
