I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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