Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Randomize
