i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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