worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
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