I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
