Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
