Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
