Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Everclear isn't food dammit
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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