don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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