My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
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