Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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