we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
