There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
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