how hairy? two words: wookie tits
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Never underestimate the power of titties
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