I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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