i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize