I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
