Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize