Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Randomize
