Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Dick very happy bro
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
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