i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
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