Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
These 21 People Are Related To Famous Celebrities
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.