i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Randomize
