Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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