It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Randomize
