so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
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