I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Randomize
