summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
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