im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize