We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
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