I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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