The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
