12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
