what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
