One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Dick very happy bro
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
