I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
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