Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
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