In the future we'll all be gay
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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