he thought i was a dude.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
