Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize
