turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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