I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
