What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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