that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
