Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
