when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
