Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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