I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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