I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
